August 20, 2010

A Friday Reflection

So, for some reason, I had it in my pretty little head that once I'd finished a year of yoga I would never have a difficult class again.  I felt like I had crossed some imaginary finish line.  I'd won the race.  I received the medal.  I had come over the peak.

Boy, was I ever wrong.

I have had more difficult classes in the last 3 months than I ever had in my first year of practice.  I am discovering new muscles every day.  One day I can do Standing Head to Knee, both sets, no problem.  The next, I can barely find my balance and my muscles are so very sore.  Oh man, and my mental state.  I am all over the bloody map.  Some days I'm happy as a pig in shit to be in the hot juicy room.  I find my peace easily.  I can focus, stay calm, breathe through my practice.  Other days, get me the hell out of there.  I curse the teacher, I curse my absolute dedication to my practice, I get so annoyed when I can't hold a pose I was able to hold the other day.

I like to believe that this is me getting deeper into my practice.  Discovering new things about myself - mentally, emotionally and physically.  That I am changing so much from the inside out that sometimes my brain and my body cannot keep up.

But whatever the reason for all these peaks and valleys - my yoga is my life saver.


Lala said...

so totally true...

i took a couple of days off and i could barely do a sit up when i went back!

i guess that's the beauty of this practice. keeps us on our toes, not just in Awkward :)

thedancingj said...

This is exactly what Bikram tells us is is supposed to happen, by the way. "In the first class, you think you have one problem. After a week, you have 30 problems. After a year, you have HUNDREDS of problems!" Or something like that. ;-)

Fiona said...

So true and beautifully written. Keep going miss, love to read about your journey!