And Now The Other Side

I haven't been to the yoga studio since Sunday.  Normally - when Victoria has not been hit by snow and there is no ice on the roads and I don't have to sweep snow off my car at 5:30 in the morning - I would have gone to two morning mysore classes by Thursday.  This morning, I did not want to do anything.  I enjoyed my chanting and my preparation for pranayama - probably because they are so new - but my asana practice was rough.  The entire time, from my first Surya Namaskr, my mind would not shut the hell up.  It just kept trying to convince me that I did not want to practice.  This is when being in a class with other people and a teacher is so very helpful.  There's peer pressure to keep moving, to keep going.  I closed right before Marichyasana A.  I was done.  I rested in child's pose after Savasana, that seemed to help ground me.

So whereas yesterday I was in love with the fact that I could create my own practice in my own living room without the need for a teacher.  Today would have been the perfect day to have someone gently coax me forward.

There's always two sides to the story.

Autumn Day

LW and I went to the beach today.  It was gorgeous outside.  Warm, crisp, happy people everywhere.

View from Clover Point.

Then I went to my Mum's to pick up some homemade apple sauce that she made me. 

Shot from Mum's backyard of my favourite tree, the Garry Oak (Quercus Garryanna

The Little Things

It is nearly Thanksgiving here in Canada and I woke this morning with a bit of a woe is me attitude.  I am removing those thoughts from my mind and taking charge of my thoughts by remembering all of the reasons I have to be thankful. 

I am grateful for:

• My supportive family.  I love that my brothers and I are now friends.  I love that my mum and I practice yoga together.  I love those moments I get all alone with my dad.
• My home.  I've been living in this small place for nearly 5 years.  It's been good to me.  LW now lives here with me.  We actually manage alright in a small space together.
• My friends.  Most of them are so far away, but I'm happy they are wherever they are.
• My bed.  It is one of my favourite places in the world.
• My Dutch heritage.  I am very proud to be Dutch.  To speak Dutch.  To look Dutch.
• My LW.  He came home from the library last week with a dictionary size book of quotes.  One of the reasons I love him.
• My yoga practice.  It is taking me on a journey of self discovery that can be painful at times but that I find perfect.

Push It, Forget It, Move on

This morning I got extremely frustrated - with lack of communication, with the feeling that I'm at people's beck and call, with the fact that I do not comprehend why people run a business and treat their employees the way they do.

Moving on.  It was my Back and Biceps day for P90 X, so I decided to take not only what I learn in my yoga practice but also what Tony Horton reiterates in his workout videos - forget it, let it go, this time is for me, focus on now!  So I pushed it.  I was tired today - maybe from the advanced yoga class yesterday.  But I fought hard.  Biceps curls and all the many versions that Tony has you doing, are not easy!  Not to mention the many different versions of pull ups.  I can do one chin up on my own with no props but in order to get through my workout, I take Tony's advice and use a chair.  I use that chair to give myself a little boost to make it up the entire way, so that I can complete 10-12 pull ups in a set. 

I feel pretty ripped by the end of this work out.  My arms feel tight, almost swollen and I feel strong.  Focusing on my workout was the best way I could have dealt with my frustration this morning.  It allowed me to re focus my attention on what was important to me at that moment and what I could actually, productively, deal with. 

Earth Day Shots

Standing Bow Pulling Pose

I adore Standing Bow. It has always been my favourite, yet I struggle with it in class all the time. I can kick high and my spine is starting to bend more and I actually discovered recently what it really means to have your shoulder on your chin. But holding it for a minute, one of the hardest things I can imagine doing. It looks mighty pretty, though, in a purple dress.

King Pigeon Pose

When I first saw this asana I thought it was the most beautiful pose I'd ever seen. I used to practice it in my living room and could never get past where I struggled to grab my foot. When I got invited to my first advanced class, it was my main question, how do you grab your foot??? It's a tricky grab but once you can visualize it, it makes it a little easier. I worked on this pose quite a bit when I was training for the competition and could never get even close to moving my arm up above my head. It was when I took a little break and backed off from my practice that it came. I find Pigeon to be one of my most challenging backward bends.

Toe Stand

This asana, is the perfect image of balance, strength and flexibility. And I can only manage to complete it when I have a camera on me. In class I lose my balance fairly easily but I say it's because I'm pooped from the standing series. I did, however, discover some new butt muscles the other day, which has allowed me to practice with my balance. I've found that if I focus on the butt cheek and hip of the leg is crossed and tighten them, this lifts my hip up so that it is inline with my other hip and allows me to stay inline.

Feet Firmly Planted

Yoga is cyclical. What you learn in the yoga studio can be brought to your outside life and what you do outside in your everyday life can be brought in to your practice.

Lately, in my Bikram yoga class, I have been working on getting my head to my knee in Standing Head to Knee (Dandayamana Janushirasana). One leg up parallel to the floor, foot flexed kicking out, standing leg locked, concrete, lamp post, elbows below the shin.  I tuck my chin and slowly move my eyes from the mirror to my hands holding my foot, down my shin, to my knee, tucking in my stomach, chin to my chest...and I stumble.  My standing foot rocks to the inside and the outside and I let go of my leg before I fall onto my mat.

Today I spent the entire class focused on my feet.  Applying pressure to the four corners, keeping myself grounded.  I pushed my standing foot down into the floor and kicked my lifted foot forward as if I were to kick the mirror. It worked!  I got my forehead to knee!

This got me thinking of how the simple yet focused action of grounding your feet during your practice prepares you to ground yourself in everyday life. So that when you feel as if you are falling out of place at work, at home, to firmly press the corners of your feet into the ground and you'll balance, you'll handle the situation firmly and calmly.

It is all connected.  What is done in the room is reflected in your outside life.  What occurs and what is practised on the outside will affect your yoga.